Summertime sadness
by patricia.remacova
Summary: Kurt and Blaine are not together. But Blaine wants them to be together. Will Kurt let him in after what happened once again? Doesn't seem like it at the moment. But it seems, fate's not working according to wishes? And what the hell happened in New York? I suck at summaries sorry lovelies I really hope it'll be better than this sum. Third Genre: Drama. Rated M for later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey folks!**

**This is my one and only story :D It was posted once but I thought it would be better of I delete it then rewrite and repost it but this time here on my private account.**

**I'll try to update as much as I can, but right now it's crazy in here with exams, so we'll see... but I'll definitely try.**

**English is not my first language, do there can be mistakes. My friend looked through it but she can't be my beta. And because of that I would like to ask someone to help me find one. Let me know I will be very thankfull.**

**Without further ado here's chapter 1.**

* * *

Standing outside the door of the house which had become so familiar to him for the past couple of years, and so distant over the past few months, Blaine took a deep breath. He glanced down at his phone for what had to be at least the 100th time that day to reread the text he had received from Burt early that morning. It still felt a little surreal to him, of course he and Burt had remained on good terms during his and Kurt's relationship, but once they had broken up he had half expected Burt to show up at his door to be meet face to face with that famous shotgun he had been threaten with couple of times. Sure he wasn't, but he would rather take that, than silent disappointment he was met with from Burt. So from this moment on he knew he wasn't very high in his 'Top favorite people' list or ever.

But there it was- _"Blaine, Carole and I would like to invite you to join us for dinner tonight. Let me know if you can make it, 6:30. -Burt"_

That was all. Blaine had of course immediately confirmed, but that didn't mean he wasn't scared shitless why. And the mystery still remained. Finally exhaling, he knocked. Just as he took his hand away, the door flew open and Blaine nearly jumped. It was Carole, who enthusiastically grabbed Blaine's arm and steered him to the kitchen. Burt was waiting, seeming just, if not more, nervous than Blaine. Deciding not to ask, Blaine stepped forward and shook his hand before taking a seat at the table. Carole did most of the talking while Blaine stared at his plate, speaking far more quietly than he ever had in the Hummel residence. Nothing significant was discussed, and Blaine found Burt's motive in inviting him increasingly more unclear. Finally, the awkward meal ended, and they all helped clear the table. Burt cleared his throat, wiping sweat off his brow as he did so.

"Okay, well Carole and I have to go run some errands...feel free to stick around a little longer, we'll be back in around half an hour, but I'm sure you'll have somewhere to be by then."

Carole gave Burt a quizzical look, and Blaine felt like doing the same before an idea grabbed hold in his mind, wiping away all other thoughts. Now it was Blaine's turn to sweat. _How did they knew?_

"Um, would you guys mind if I...um, went..." he motioned with his hand in no particular direction.

"To Kurt's room?" Burt asked, looking oddly blissful if not a little confirmed with the suggestion Blaine had yet to make. "Um, yeah. You were with Kurt for quite some time. I don't know if it's the right move to let you in, but... I know you are miserable Blaine. We were at Sectionals, did you know?" when Blaine shook his head Burt continued. "Well, yeah we were, we cheered you on. But...uhm..."

"Yeah I know," Blaine mumbled with slight embarrassment and lowered his head. "That's why you'd invited me over?"

"Yeah. Well, I mean you know, closure... and stuff. And we wanted to see how you're doing." Blaine nodded, relieved.

"Feel free, sweetie," Carole added sympathetically, while looking slightly confused between Blaine and her husband.

"Okay, well uh... thanks for having me over, I thought you don't want to see me again since me and Kurt are no longer a couple. I'll find my way out, I'll be gone by the time you're back. I don't want to... um... intrude..." he continued awkwardly.

"You are not intruding honey," Carol smiled at him. "We love to have you over. We said you're always welcomed here even if you and Kurt are no longer together doesn't mean we wouldn't love to see you now and then. I like having you around."

"Don't worry about it," Burt nodded in agreement, looking Blaine straight in the eye, "We'll have to do this again...soon."

Something in the way Burt said 'soon' made Blaine's heart skip a beat, because surely that meant something to do with Kurt. He snapped back into focus in time to wave as Carole and Burt left, leaving Blaine alone in their house. Slowly, Blaine walked up the stairs. The break-up between him and Kurt was still an open wound, and although he knew this was a little creepy, he hoped that seeing one of the places they had come so close, would help him to move on. He knew it was an invasion, but Burt hadn't seemed to mind and.

Before Blaine could question his possibly twisted motives anymore, the door was open and he was standing on Kurt's carpet, in Kurt's room, and everything just felt so _Kurt_. It all came back to him-all the moments and memories and he felt tears well up in his eyes no matter how hard he tried to push them away. He wondered how could he still have some tears left. He must cry out oceans of them.

And then his breath caught in his throat. There, on Kurt's desk, was a picture of him and Kurt in the choir room. He moved a little closer and saw a stuffed puppy in his hand-the one Kurt had bought him when his brother Cooper was visiting. He smiled remembering it, a smile which quickly faded as he came across a second picture, this one more recent. He recognized Kurt, Rachel, and now Santana's New York apartment in the background, all three of them were in the picture, but who was that other guy?

The guy had blonde hair and piercing blue eyes, he was pale and tall, and there was something distinctly English about him. "Much taller than me," Blaine mussed. And he was standing suspiciously close to Kurt and had his hand around Kurt's waist...and not at all in friendly manner.

_That son of a bitch! _Strong pang of a jealousy hurt in his chest.

Blaine's heart sank before beating way too fast as a chorus of thoughts ran through his head. _Has Kurt moved on? Is that his boyfriend? What was he supposed to do?_

"Nothing." He said out loud dejectedly. "You won't do anything because there's nothing left for you to do."

Blaine sank down onto the bed behind him to stop the room from spinning as tears rolled down his cheeks. He ran hands over the fluffy comforter before standing up again. It was_ Kurt's bed_. Just Kurt's not Kurt and Blaine's. He looked at the clock on Kurt's nightstand and realized he had only been there for a couple minutes, although it felt like forever. Not able to stay any longer, Blaine rushed down the stairs, nearly tripping, grabbed his coat and left the house without looking back.

In his rushed he almost ran past two people nearly on the ground. His plan had been to run to his car and drive as fast and far as possible, but the scene in the front yard stopped him cold. There sitting in the grass was Carole, talking frantically into her cell phone, and next to her, unconscious, was Burt.

* * *

Kurt sat in his bed reading an assignment for one of his classes at NYADA when his phone buzzed next to him. Glad to have a distraction he eagerly picked it up, but nearly dropped it again when he saw the caller ID. Blaine's smiley face was looking back at him. He should delete the contact. A million questions popped in his head, but none had time to be answered before Kurt's finger moved and pressed the green button, independent from everything his brain was yelling. He was dying to hear his voice again.

"Hello?" he said, a little too breathily, a little too emotionally. He felt Blaine hesitate, and bit his lip, hard. He remember the last time Blaine called. Don't need to be said it didn't end well. There was a lot of crying and yelling involved. That was a couple of months ago. There were a few text, mainly saying Sorry and various sorts of apologies but he haven't replied on any of them. How could he? The only person he could trust with his life took everything from him and spat in his face. But his strong shell was crumbling as the time went by. There wasn't hatred anymore, just hurt. And this hurt prevented him for calling Blaine or even answering the calls when Blaine tried to contact him. And in a time Blaine stopped trying. And Kurt never tried to call back.

"Um.. Hi Kurt." He noted that Blaine sounded close to tears. "I'm not really sure what or how to say this so I think I'll just say that..." Kurt lay back in his bed, preparing for another apology in that velvety sweet voice, one that this time he wasn't sure he could reject.

"...your dad.. .he - he's in the hospital, Kurt." Blaine ended in a whisper. Kurt bolted up straight, almost hitting his head on the too-low ceiling. Again, a million questions swirled through his head, but all Kurt managed to blurt out was "What?! Is he okay?"

"Doctor said they stabilized him. That's all I know."

"I'm on my way to the airport right now. If you'll get a chance tell him I'll come as soon as I can." With that he hung up, and the only thing he thought about was his dad. It wasn't until he was on the plane and halfway through his 94 minute trip that he realized he could've asked Blaine what was going on, although how Blaine knew and why it was him not Carol who called was still a mystery to him. He sighed, and settled back into his seat, knowing that all there was left to do was wait, he'll find out soon enough.

* * *

As Kurt entered the hospital, he shivered slightly as old memories resurfaced. He took a deep breath, reminding himself why he was there, and approached the main desk.

"Burt Hummel's room?" He asked, concern streaked across his face.

"You family?" the nurse behind the desk asked looking at the computer.

"Son." Kurt answered, dabbing his fingers onto desk, praying for her to do it faster and not caused him to grow grey hair by the time she'll done.

"3rd floor, room 234 to the left," the nurse running it replied, smiling at him sympathetically.

"Thanks." And with that he ran for the stairs, elevator was too slow for this.

Entering the room, Kurt found Blaine sitting by Burt's bed. Carol was sleeping on the couch, but Kurt could see by the redness around her eyes that she had been crying a lot. Probably since all this has started. Blaine looked up at Kurt from where his head was hanging low and they shared a painful sigh.

Kurt looked so sad, uncertain and heartbroken that Blaine's heart bled every time he looked up at him. More than anything, he wanted to come to him and hug him tightly like he always did, this need only intensified by his physical presence in the same room, but he was too afraid. Too afraid that he'll be pushed away again like he was so many times. But he had never seen so much pain on his face. What to do, what to say?

He looked up at Kurt again, at the exact time to see the tear roll down his face. Blaine's heart felt like it was being pulled apart. Unable to help himself, Blaine lowered his face as his own tears made their way down his cheeks. Crying quietly, he brushed them away so Kurt wouldn't notice. As Kurt took a couple self-conscious steps towards his dad's bed while Blaine's eyes burned into a certain spot above his temple. A spot which sported a small white bandage, decorated with a couple dots of red. With his eyebrows knitted together in worry, Blaine tried to think of how it could've happened, noticing his heartbeat rise significantly with each new possibility.

Firmly, Kurt grabbed his dad's hand and Burt stirred and opened his eyes to look at his only son.

"What are you doing here Kurt?" Burt cried out when took in it was Kurt." I told Carole not to call you. I am fine, perfect even I am just- " he cut himself when his eyes fixated on the exact same spot Blaine had. "What do you have on your head? Is that what I think? Oh my god Kurt what happened? And your hand...?!" Burt sputtered as he awoke fully in a couple of seconds.

"Shh. Hi dad," Kurt greeted warmly while trying to calm his dad. "Blaine called me okay and I am glad he did I see. Were you not going to tell me about this at all?! And don't change the subject. It was just a stupid accident during... rehearsal for our next week performance. Oh and I wanted to invite you all to it." Kurt said but his eyes narrowed on his dad."Let's just turn back to you, all right . What happened? Tell me."

"I don't know really, the doctor did some tests, but didn't tell me anything yet." said Burt with a sigh. At that moment, the doctor stepped back into the bedroom.

"What - ?" started Kurt, but his voice cracked a little on the question but he stopped when the doctor raised his hand to stop all the questions.

"You're Burt's son aren't you? Kurt?" the doctor looked up at Burt. He nodded approval with a little smile and looked at Kurt.

"So come at us," said Burt and Kurt couldn't help a small smile at the comment while he took a deep breath. Blaine woke up Carole and put arm around her waist for support.

"You're okay Burt, it's nothing to do with heart," Kurt closed his eyes and breathed out lowering his head a little, "actually it looks better than month ago. In short, your body was attacked by an infection and your immune system could not handle it, which led to low blood pressure which caused your collapse." The doctor smiled encouragingly.

"Thank God," Carole said, putting her head into her hands. The doctor noticed Kurt was still pale.

"Breathe Kurt, don´t worry! How about you'll sit down and drink some water because now, I think you'll be that one who's going to collapse. Your dad is gonna be fine. Better than new may I say." the doctor joked giving his shoulder light squeeze.

"Yeah, yeah. I have to sit. Thank you doctor." nodded Kurt.

"Okay Burt we will give you some antibiotics and I think if everything goes how we want we can send you home the day after tomorrow. We want to watched after you for a while. So, that is all for now and I have to go. Have a nice day, and Kurt? ... just take it easy, alright?" the doctor winked and then left.

"Do not frighten me like this anymore dad. I can't do it anymore," said Kurt quietly with head in his hands.

"COPY," smiled Burt," but that's exactly why I didn't want to call you right after this, because I wanted to hear the doctor first and then call you if necessary. And look it's not. By the way Blaine I told you do not call him..."

"I'm sorry," whispered Blaine and didn't look at Burt.

"...but it doesn't matter, I knew you would," he said, smiling at Blaine who smiled back a little, "and I'm really glad you're here Kurt don't think I am not. I've missed you, we haven't seen you since Mr. Shue's 'almost wedding'!"

"I've missed you too dad. A lot," Kurt stood up and kissed his dad on the forehead.

"Show me this..." Burt takes Kurt´s head into his hands and looked over his son's injury.

"How did this happen?" Burt asked, his voice laced with concern, thinking of the years of bullying his son had endured.

"I told you already Dad. What more do you want to know?"

"I heard that. You had an accident on the dance rehearsal. I want to know what _exactly_ happened with all the details and how."

"You know... We was just dancing and one of the dancers pushed me, he didn't mean to, but I lost my balance and I landed on the edge of a piano. So I got one stitch and a couple of bruises and my hand is sore, because I tried to catch myself but I just hurt my hand, but if I haven't my head would be probably worse." Kurt rolled his eyes.

Burt eyed him for a while but huffed and grunted. "Okay I believe you, but be more careful next time kid, please."

"Said by someone laying in a hospital bed," said Kurt with a scoff, "I will. Promise."

"I didn't give myself an infection." Burt retorted.

"I haven't tripped over my own feet." Kurt shot right back.

"Okay Kurt we can call it a truce if you want to but for now I want you to go home it´s late. And I want to be honest with you... you look really terrible...did you sleep last night?" asked Burt worriedly.

"Not really. I have loads of stuff to do for school tests are breathing on my neck and then I couldn't in the plane I was really worried. Have you called Finn?" Kurt asked and looked around for somewhere to lie down.

"Uh-uh. No, Kurt go home. I'll be there in two days. Don't worry I feel much better now. And no we haven't called Finn, we'll call him now to let him know what's happening. How'd you get here?"

"I took a cab from the airport," Kurt replied tiredly.

"Blaine, could you drive him?" Burt asked and Blaine startled at the sudden question.

Him and Kurt in the same closed space? Not likely.

"As long as it's okay with Kurt..." Blaine said quietly, gesturing to Kurt already feeling dejected. That's what he's been receiving for a while now after all.

Burt eyes softened when he took in Blaine almost curled into himself and turned to his son. Kurt looked to Blaine and shrugged, his face not giving anything away, but he crumpled when he looked at Blaine. "Carole?"

"No I am not going, I'll stay with your dad and call to Finn in a minute you can go and sleep honey. We'll be just fine," she said, standing up, and walking over to Burt's bed where she clasped his hand in hers. Kurt kissed his dad again and hugged Carole tightly. He took a deep breath and with one last lingering glance he walked out of the room, knowing that Blaine would follow.

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**Love? Hate?**

**Do you want Kurt to yell and sent Blaine away? Do you want him to take Blaine back?**

**Leave a review they'll make my day and I'll sent you cyber cookies.**

**P xx**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey everyone! Sorry it's taken so long to update I have been really busy..**

**So here's a little premise for this chapter: the hook-up in 'I Do' never happened. Okay?** **It's a little fluffy an angsty, but it matters, promise.**

**Also, this is completely un-betad so know I am very very so for all the grammar mistakes I am sure I made. Please bear with me and if you can't you can still help me ;)**

**Enjoy!**

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"Why me? God dammit...all the shit... me..." Kurt muttered angrily to himself, shaking his head fiercely, as they left the hospital, feeling Blaine's eyes on his back the entire time. Nervously, he drummed his fingers on his thigh. He felt so... empty? Broken? Sad? Damn. He didn't even know. But it definitely wasn't his best day. More than anything, he wanted to turn around and hug Blaine and maybe, just maybe never stay there for a longest time... and never let go. Jesus, he didn't understand himself, he shouldn't be feeling like this, he mentally scolded himself again, for the third time in the last fifteen minutes.

They walked further into a parking lot, Blaine one step behind Kurt.

"Kurt..." came tentative whisper, and the urge grew more and more until Kurt just couldn't stop himself. He came into a halt and turned around. It took only one look into Blaine's eyes and everything came back rushing to him. Every memory. Every touch, every kiss. Despite everything what happened he couldn't forget how protected he felt in Blaine's arms. His face crumbled and he threw himself into Blaine's embrace sobbing, before he had a chance to start second guessing again, unable to stifle hot tears anymore. It was not time to second guess. He couldn't bring himself to hesitate anymore. And frankly, thinking about it, he didn't want to. Having these strong arms he missed every day around himself again, made it all feel better.

Blaine seemed startled a little at first, but gladly hugged Kurt back, infinitely happy that Kurt had taken the first step, although his reasons were still unclear. Of course he wanted to be held after having horrible day and Burt was in serious condition again but Blaine dared to hope that maybe, just maybe it meant more than just a simple friendly, soothing hug. Blaine unconsciously tightened his hold noticeably when Kurt shivered.

"Shh, it'll be okay," he ran his hands up and down Kurt's back soothingly swaying them from side to side lightly, when Kurt let out another sob and sag against him.

"Y-yeah I know. 'm sorry it just kind of wanted to came out and I couldn't stop it," he mumbled sniffling. "Sorry about the jacket though."

Blaine chuckled. "Hey," Blaine hooked his finger under Kurt's chin, bringing his head up from where he was resting his forehead on Blaine's shoulder and continued in soft voice. "Don't worry about it. Either jacket or the tears I get that. Your dad is very important to you and I am not even surprised by your reaction. I would be more shocked if you'd remained calm." Blaine stopped talking and lost himself in an ocean blue eyes, "I'm really glad you're here Kurt. I missed you so much," whispered Blaine still holding Kurt in his arms.

"I missed you too Blaine. Really, I did." whispered Kurt back looking Blaine in the eye offering small smile, then, with their faces so close to one another remembering himself, he pulled off and started to turn away from Blaine so they could finally leave, leaving Blaine fighting back pathetic whimper at the lost contact. Blaine's eyes followed his every move as they had all evening and it seemed Kurt was losing his balance. And indeed a while after he almost dropped on the pavement if it were not for Blaine's strong catching him right in time. He enveloped Kurt tightly in his arms, bringing him into his chest cuddled him.

Kurt's eyes were closed and he looked even paler than before. His breathing was short and shallow.

"Kurt! K - kurt are you alright? What's wrong?" Blaine asked, his voice quivering with tension and worry, the latter he was now always feeling around Kurt.

"I don't know Blaine...I just don't feel very well, please take me home?" Kurt answered questioningly and quietly, scaring Blaine because he was so quiet he almost didn't hear him.

"Okay. Just... don't fall okay!" Kurt tottered a bit when Blaine let go for a second in favor of opening the door for him. Blaine pushed him onto passenger's seat, then buckled his seatbelt. "Alright." He took his key out of his pocket, got into the car himself and turned to look at Kurt. His eyes were still closed, he was breathing slowly and he got some color in his face again and Blaine put his palm on Kurt's cheek and stroked it gently.

"Better?" Blaine asked a little sheepishly.

"Yeah. It's probably only sleep deprivation and stress overdose. Thank you Blaine, for doing this." Kurt said, turning to Blaine, his eyes wide open now. Blaine stopped his key mid-turn, lost in those incredibly beautiful blue eyes he hadn't seen for so long. All it took for the 'closure' he had attempted to that point to crumble was that one look. Blaine realized without a doubt that he still loved Kurt. Not that he'd thought he ever stopped. It was just more... prominent now, with Kurt so close next to him.

The pain in each of their eyes seemed to drain each boy more and more as the gaze continued. Finally, Kurt closed his eyes again and pulled Blaine out of his trance. With a deep breath, Blaine started the engine and drove to the Hummel's house that he had been to only that evening. Looking at his watch, Blaine saw that is was now close to two in the morning. They got out of the car and Blaine looked at Kurt to make sure he was steady, concluding that he seemed okay now. Kurt took a deep breath and moved in the direction of his house without looking back, leaving Blaine unsure of what to do. _Should he follow him?_ Kurt walked in but he didn't close the door.

_Screw it! Burt did tell him to keep an eye on him. That's all he's doing...no more no less._ He thought, trying to convince himself more than anything else. "Just cut the crap Blaine!" he rolled eyes on his own antics.

"Kurt?" whispered Blaine as he entered the house. He heard something from upstairs. _He's in his bedroom. _He went up. Kurt was standing beside the window and staring out on the backyard.

"Tell me why Blaine." Kurt asked still staring through the window with his back turned to Blaine.

"Why what?"

"Why is everything rushing at me? I feel like walls are closing around me. They suffocate me. And... I feel so alone." asked Kurt, his voice quivering. Blaine didn't really know what he meant, or what to say, but he captured that he had said everything. Everything?

"What happened Kurt? Please tell me what's wrong." Blaine came closer and they almost touched each other. He received no response. He sighed.

"You're not alone Kurt. You have your family and friends and school, your dreams and... me. You will always have me, in a way you need me." He said but he couldn't give up on his hope of them being a couple again. Not just yet. He had to try. For the last time. Maybe it was all the spontaneous scenes of song at Dalton and McKinley finally getting to him, but Blaine could honestly think of only one response to the situation. Softly, he began to sing.

_Same bed, but if feels just a little bit bigger now...our song on the radio, but it don't sound the same._

_When our friends talk about you all that it does is just tear me down...'cause my heart breaks a little when I hear your name._

Blaine hesitantly took Kurt's hand.

_And it all just sounds like ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh..._

_Hmm too young, too dumb, to realize_

_That I should have bought you flowers, and held your hand_

_Should have gave you all my hours when I had the chance_

_Take you to every party, cause all you wanted to do was dance_

_Now my baby's dancin', but he's dancin' with another man.._

_Noticing the way Kurt stiffened at that lyric, and interpreting it as uncomfortableness, Blaine awkwardly dropped his hand and quickly skipped to the end._

_Although it hurts I'll be the first to say that I was wrong_

_Oh, I know I'm probably much too late_

_To try and apologize for my mistakes, but..._

Before Blaine could get out the rest of the line, Kurt launched on him and crashed their lips together in a fierce kiss. Blaine lost his balance and they both fell into Kurt's desk. Everything on the table shuddered and they heard something drop down on the floor with a crash. They both looked to see what it was, and Blaine picked the thing up. He was holding the photo of Kurt with the mysterious blue eyed boy, Rachel, and Santana in their New York apartment, the frame ruined and the glass tearing at each member of the picture threateningly.

"I'm sorry Kurt I didn't want..."said Blaine.

"It's not your fault...I, hm, kind of threw myself at you. Quite literally to be exact. I should be the one apologizing not you." Kurt shook his head, taking the picture from his hands and looking at the photo." Actually..." What happened next shocked Blaine almost as much as the fact that Kurt had kissed him. He picked up the mostly shattered frame and said while looking down at the photo intently. "I don't need this anymore. You gave it a justice, but it's missing something, don't you think?" he asked confused Blaine and with that he threw it against the wall, hard, causing the shards that remained to crack and fall to the floor, and leaving a dent in his otherwise perfectly kept wall.

"Kurt..." Blaine gasped, eyes blown wide.

"Kurt... what's that supposed to mean?" asked Blaine as his eyes flickered between Kurt and mess on the carpet. He continued "Kurt I know something's up. I know you. We should not be seeing each other anymore, but I think I am still the one who knows you the best. This is not you. You are not throwing things. And you've spent some time in a presence of Furious four. You've never thrown a fit once." Blaine stated, but still not getting any response.

Well, maybe he was lying a bit, Kurt had thrown a fit once. To be more exact, it was a bucket full of ice water what was thrown. At Jeff while he was still in the shower unsuspecting anything. Idiot forgot to lock the door. There wasn't anybody to play with fire Kurt Hummel surely was, and walk away without revenge... and his moisturizers were sacred! Blaine was still flinching every time he remembered when the bloodcurdling scream flew down the hall. But that one particular incident was quite hilarious. This situation was not in the slightest. In fact it was unusual and scary for Blaine. He didn't know what to do. He felt like hitting the wall on the dead end. He was becoming desperate rather quickly.

"Kurt!" Blaine finally raised his voice, because he couldn't stand the quiet treatment anymore. He regretted it a moment later though, as Kurt turned, but not far enough so Blaine couldn't see his face. All he saw was one lonely tear drop onto the desk in front of them.

Blaine's heart sank.

_No don't do this to me Kurt please, don´t cry. __He pleaded in his head, not knowing what to do. He wanted to pull Kurt into his arms and just hold tight and take all the pain away, but he just couldn't not after earlier episode of awkwardness. Kurt kissed him but surely he was only... emotionally strained and wasn't thinking straight._

_Dammit you screwed it up already and you didn't even talk normally, dammit, dammit...WELL DONE ANDERSON! He is on the edge with his feelings and everything and all you can think about to do in that moment is yelling. Yeah, just fantastic... __Blaine scolded himself for being such an insensitive jerk again__.__Today was totally in his favor. And he was talking to himself! He needed a shrink._

_He sighed and pressed heels of his palms against his eyes frustratingly . This was leading nowhere. He had to get Kurt to talk somehow._

He placed tentative hand on Kurt's shoulder and lightly squeezed it. He really wanted to know what was going on, but he didn't want to push Kurt anymore than he already had. He'd tell him when he'll be ready.

"I am sorry Kurt. I really wasn't... look, I really do care about you no matter what and I want you to trust me. We were best friend and I still kind of hope there is something between us still. I - I just want you to trust me in everything, with your feelings and your fears. You can tell me, but I don't want to push you into it I ...I just want you to _trust me_ and... this is really important for me Kurt. And I am sorry I yelled." he finished, almost breathless. "I am here for you. Always. Know that?"

Kurt frowned a little, and when he looked up at Blaine he could see how much emotions were reflected in Kurt's expressive eyes. Pain, sadness, helplessness, fear...all that was reflected in those beautiful eyes, blue, green and mixed with gray, yes... they were beautiful. He could always say what he was feeling only from simple look into that deep pools of blue liquid. They were exactly the same as Blaine had remembered, and he couldn't tear his eyes away for x time this day. He was so... Blaine realized he couldn't find the right words to describe Kurt. He was everything he had ever wanted and ever would want. But it's over now, Blaine reminded himself, before his thoughts again spun out of control.

This thoughts led Blaine into self-pitying and remorse again.

_He was such an IDIOT. Why did he does this to them? Destroyed everything amazing they have built up together. They could have spent the rest of their lives together and he knew Kurt wanted to. But after what he did, Kurt couldn´t even trust him or look him straight in the eyes. _

_They haven't talk to each other for months for God's sake._

_He should have gone to New York sooner..not waited until was being rather pathetic, but once the stream of thoughts started it was hard to stop them._

_Maybe I shouldn't have told him about it...No. __Blaine shook his head resolutely__. __He couldn't have lived with that burden on his shoulders. He was not a liar. He had to be completely honest with Kurt as they always were to each other no matter what it was about. And something like this... let's be honest for a moment here, the truth would have come out eventually and they would've still broken up...but probably more worse and much more painfully, and Kurt would never talk to him again. Blaine took a deep breath, realizing how much time was passing by in silence. He had to be happy what he had now, not to spend time pitying his sorry ass for what he didn't. Maybe it was not much, but at least it was something. It was more than through last months. Basically, it could be much worse. Kurt could have cut him off from his life and hate him forever,_ he continued to think, bitterly.

But now was not a time to think, because Kurt had finally turned around to stare right at him. He was looking straight in his eyes with so much force Blaine had never noticed in his glance before. Blaine saw his eyes lit up. This was familiar look to him. Oh God, how much he missed it. There was no hate, bitterness or even sadness or pain, he'd saw when their eyes met briefly at wedding reception. There wasn't the trace of them in Kurt's eyes now. But there was another expression in his eyes. Something he thought he would never see directed at himself again.

Could it be ― ?

"I know," whispered Kurt, leaned to Blaine and pressed their lips together softly. "I do trust you."

― no way, it couldn't be. Not after what had happened. He told him he didn't want to have anything with him again, and as much as it pained him to do so, he had to admit not without good reason. So why that rather surprising twitch. Not that he was complaining right now. He cherished every moment of it.

Blaine closed his eyes and melted into this simple kiss. It was like he had been drowning, but now someone had lifted him up out of the water and he could breathe again. He was vaguely aware of the fact that Kurt could at any time realize that he actually didn't want this again, that is was a mistake and brush it off as just a big misunderstanding and broke his heart even more. He whimpered when Kurt pulled away after that one kiss, and he was glad that his eyes were still closed.

He waited for a guillotine to cut his air away again.

He didn't want to cry, but he could feel the tears biting him in the corners of his eyes, so he closed them more tightly. As much as he tried it was not avail. Hot salty tear escaped him anyway.

But then, something warm touched his cheek. The place where the tear was, he could feel warm and soft lips. He gasped out a breath he didn't know he was holding. Blaine opened his eyes, but everything was blurry, so he wiped them and gazed enraptured at Kurt, who was staring right back at him. He needed only one second and knew none of this was wrong. Blaine could still read him very well, and Kurt's eyes had always been a mirror of his soul. But what Blaine was seeing didn't make any sense at the moment. There was only one explanation to that expression. Yes, he had to be right.

_Love._

Kurt put his hand on Blaine's neck and he could feel how warm his hand was. He sighed in that touched and saw that Kurt's bottom lip was trembling. He was so close to him, their noses were touching now. Blaine took a deep breath and he was enjoying Kurt's scent. Vanilla and cinnamon.

OH. MY. GOD. This boy will be the death of him.

He couldn't handle it anymore, and his eyes flickered to Kurt's lips for the briefest moment.

As they hurried to press their lips together in the same time, they both sighed in pleasure. They kissed slowly first, but Blaine wrapped his hands around Kurt's waist, no more shying away, and pulled him closer and tightened his grip so much that Kurt gasped into his mouth.

"Sorry," Blaine loosened his grip and pulled away a little but their lips brushed together without not actually kissing. It was sensual and completely consuming.

Kurt stayed silent and they both stood like this a while, with any redundant space between them, their lips didn't touch.

"So..." Blaine started hesitantly, "what... I mean... I remember, your behavior, towards me was very different last time." He really didn't want to have this conversation now or, well ever really, but it was unavoidable and he was curious. Through he was happy as hell he must admit that he was afraid that Kurt only played some insane, twisted game with him to get him back for what he did to him. Everybody can lie and not just through sight, to make the other feel completely safe and then attack and hit a thousand times harder that they could ever expected. Blaine knew that wasn't the way Kurt was, but this situation was really more than odd. And he had hurt him badly, he knew that, but he couldn't allow himself to hurt him again.

And Kurt was studying acting school after all. Just merely pointing out do not stake me now.

"I remember that, quite hard to forget" Kurt's voice was a little tight and he grimaced, "but I was thinking a lot and my life was…. huh, ehm, pretty falling apart after ―" he pulled away and turned to the window, staring through it, and Blaine resisted the urge to whimper or do something similar or more embarrassing, so he let go, although his hands were itching to touch, and Kurt took a deep breath before continuing. "You... just... this isn't just about you. This is about everything what happened after you - cheated on me" Kurt finished with visible difficulties. "NYADA, Rachel is fighting against me because of her ego and Santana is driving me crazy with her never ending... Mexican-third eye conspiracies or whatever, then we've got you, and my dad obviously, who is hiding things from me, A ―" Kurt winced and Blaine frowned.

A ―? A- what? That must be that English looking boy in the photo? Blaine bit back a groan, the name possibilities were endless. Addy? Aron? Adolf?

Yeah British bastard with Hitler's first name. Fitting perfectly.

Blaine clasped his hands into fists but stayed silent, jealousy rushing through his body and heartbeat speeding up insanely quickly. Kurt seemed to be torn and nervous like he said more than he actually wanted.

"So you and this... guy are exclusive now?" Blaine asked more harsh then he wanted and tried to stay calm. He realized that Kurt was clenching window sill, his fingers turned white. Blaine reached out and put his hand on Kurt's lower arm, "Kurt ―"

"No we are not exclusive, never were and never will be. I need to drink something" Kurt was shaking slightly his glance turned cold and he gently shook Blaine's hand off his arm when he looked over at Blaine, "do you want me to bring you something?"

"Sure." Blaine nodded, his frown deepening as he watched Kurt leave the room.

_What the hell was happening?_

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**Woohoo so that was Chapter 2.**

**If you have any questions don't shy away and ask, reviews will make my day**

**Love? Hate? Let me know**

**See ya nex time**

**P**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello guys good to see you again!**

**I am updating sooner with another chapter, because I have a feeling a need to make up for the long wait between first and second chapter, to you guys. **

**So without unnecessary rambling here is Chapter 3.**

**Disclaimer: I don****'t ****own Glee if I did, The Warblers would be still in it.**

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_That was, wow... super odd_, Blaine thought and wished Kurt had told him something. But that would be more difficult accomplish as it seemed Kurt was reluctant. He sighed and moved on to the other side of the room where the photo had hit the wall. He was glancing at the mess on the carpet for a little while when he realized he was still alone and Kurt wasn't there. He frowned and moved to the staircase.

"Kurt?" he called down. "You coming upstairs?"

"Yeah. Wait a minute." Kurt called back from the living room and Blaine heard a ting.

After one minute Kurt showed in the door and carried a bottle and two glasses.

"What is in there?" Blaine asked with a curious look and raised his eyebrow.

"Don't know. I have a feeling we will find out." Kurt said with a shrug and grin, but Blaine noticed that his smile didn't touch his eyes.

Kurt opened the bottle and infused liquid into the glasses.

"Here we go. Cheers." Kurt said and handed out the glass for Blaine to take it.

"When you said,_ something_ to drink, I thought something more like... I don't know non-alcoholic." Blaine said when he took a glass and smelled an alcohol. He wrinkled his nose. "You don't drink."

"Well," Kurt took a deep breath., "there's a first time for everything, isn't there?" he smiled half-heartedly. "And as you sure remember I told you I was drunk once, and hurled all over Ms. Pilsburry's shoes. I am sure after very horrifying breakdown she took some anti-contamination showers in the hospital." He grimaced.

Blaine choked back a laugh and took a sip. He spluttered at the same time as Kurt. His throat burned and tears were falling down his cheeks. He looked at Kurt, well he tried to but his vision was swimming, but he was sure he was tearing up as well and he was blinking furiously back at him. When they eyes met, they both burst into uncontrollable laughter.

"You'd better make tea." Blaine breathed out a new set of tears falling down his cheeks, now from laughter, when he tried to catch his breath.

"Y-yeah s-sorry." Kurt coughed and tried to wipe his eyes but he gave up when his eyes get more agitated from rubbing harshly.

"I made a mistake, I s-should've waited for you to try it first." Blaine said with a rough voice, his mouth still on fire.

"H-old on." Kurt took his glass with a wry face and went to the bathroom hurriedly. "Here." he pushed the glass filled with water back to his hand.

They both sighed in relief when cold water hit their burning throats and their eyes were settling back into normal thanks God.

"What the hell was that? Gasoline?" Blaine asked when he was finished with his water.

"Don't know. Hope I haven't just poisoned both of us." Kurt said and Blaine took the bottle to look at the label.

"This Irish product, has a 70% alcohol concentration and is made of potatoes ―" he cut off and moved his eyes from the bottle to Kurt, staring at him and raised an eyebrow. "_Really_ Kurt?"

Kurt was glancing back at him, his jaw dropped for a moment and he burst into something between laughter and a cough and he started to tear up again. "It was in the cabinet for as long as I remember so I thought we could finish it off."

"_Disgusting_." Blaine shivered. "I think your dad has a reason he haven't touched that."

"Okay. Give it back to me." Kurt took the bottle from his hands big grin on his face. "Wanna try it again?" Kurt asked wiggling his eyebrows, smirking.

"Are you crazy?" he shook his head. "Don't want to die. I am still too young." he grinned. "Will you?"

"First time is the worst, the second one should be better... perhaps," he added thoughtfully.

"No. You are not going to drink that again. I think you'll poison yourself and I am going to be the one, who would take you to the hospital. They would give you a bed next to your dad." Blaine gave him a stern look.

"Rude. You're aware that that had a double meaning, right?" Kurt raised his eyebrow. "I should be hurt right now."

"Sorry Kurt. You know I didn't meant it like _that_." Blaine's voice was small as he threw an apologetic look at Kurt. The last thing he wanted was to made him sad about fact that his dad was in hospital.

"I got it." Kurt smiled, but frowned. "Anyway, how did you know what happened? You were with my dad when he... ehm you know?"

"Not exactly. Carole was with him. I was in you― erm... well they asked me here for dinner." Blaine blurted out praying Kurt didn't notice unspoken _'-in your bedroom'_. He would probably find that _stalkerish_... and rightly so, Blaine guessed.

"Really. Why?" Kurt gave him curious and confused look.

"Have no clue."

And that was truth. Blaine had no idea why they did that especially considering what happened between him and Kurt. He should ask them sometime. Kurt didn't say anything just stood there in his fashion and sweet and hot clothes, Blaine wanted to ripped them off and...very, very tight pants...

_Crap Blaine. This is worse than I thought._ His heart sped up so much that he was frightened Kurt could hear it and his palms started to sweat. Kurt's eyes was bright as they always were when he was happy. He could literally feel the spark and tension between them in that moment and Blaine was sure Kurt felt it too, because he had torn his eyes from Blaine's and looked nervous. But he noticed they flicked with new emotion. The same one he saw a half an hour ago and the one he was sure Kurt could see in his eyes.

"Well. You were always welcomed here. That haven't changed. Besides you can charm the pants off of everybody, so, you know how Carole is. And dad likes you, you are a great guy, that is just a fact. I... ehm... I'm gonna put that back." Kurt motioned to the bottle, grabbed the alcohol and left the room so quickly Blaine had no time to say something.

_OH GOD._ Blaine wiped his palms dry on his pants. He couldn't sit still so he jumped up and started pacing back and forth. _What am I going to do now?_ But he had no time to think it through because Kurt came back and he reacted instinctively before he could stop himself.

"Blaine? Whe―"

Blaine grabbed him and turned him around and Kurt squeaked a bit in surprise, his eyes wide, but he didn't push him away. Blaine captured his lips in his and pushed him against the wall gently. Kurt stiffened for a moment but relaxed a second later in a gentle touch. He wrapped both his hands around Blaine's neck pulling him closer and deepening the kiss. Blaine, encouraged with the fact that Kurt didn't pull away, wrapped his arms around Kurt's waist, kissing him like there was no tomorrow.

In fact there could be no tomorrow for him, and Blaine was afraid of the moment when Kurt decided to stop what he was just doing with his talented mouth. But he didn't. Kurt was kissing him back with as much intensity as Blaine.

"You really want that?" Blaine breathe out against Kurt's lips, when they pulled away for air.

Kurt replayed with covering Blaine's lips with his own again.

"Hm...but," Blaine muttered, "you've got a boyf―"

"I haven't." Kurt cut him off and pressed his body to Blaine's.

Blaine's heart fluttered. He didn't need to hear anything more. Kurt's lips were so soft and sweet and full of lust, just as much as his own were. He'd never forgotten the taste of Kurt, he'd dreamt about it sometimes. He knew he would never be able to get enough of it. Kurt is _single_. That guy_ is NOT_ his_ boyfriend_. With this ascertained, Blaine moved his lips with enthusiasm from Kurt's lips to his jaw then to his silky neck.

Kurt's hot breath hit Blaine's cheek in a way that sent shivers down his spine. His heart was hammering against his ribs so loudly he thought Kurt would be able to hear it, because he could hear Kurt's heart in his chest. Blaine pulled back and pressed their sweating foreheads together and moved his one hand and enlaced in Kurt's hair, the other hand on his cheek. They were both breathing heavily, their hot breath hitting each other's lips and filling the small space between them. They looked at each other with wide eyes their pupils dilated with lust.

But whatever is happening here, Blaine wanted to set things straight.

"I know_ this_ doesn't mean we are together again, but I'm still not sure if this is real or not. I keep thinking I'm going to wake up and find out this is all just a wonderful dream," he added, laughing nervously, his heart breaking on his own words.

"I can tell you_ this_ is real." Kurt whispered and smiled softly at him, his eyes bright and rich blue. There was no sign of gray or green. Kurt was absolutely happy. Happy to be here with_ him in his arms._

Blaine tightened his fingers in Kurt's hair and kissed him again this time more passionate than before, he wanted to be sure it was not a dream. That Kurt wasn't going to vanish any second. He wasn't expecting this to happen, but who was he to say no to hot make out session with the love of his life. It seemed like ages to him since he'd seen Kurt happy in his company. On the photo with his friends, he seemed to be a little... but nothing like he was now. With_ Blaine._

Blaine gently grabbed Kurt's arms, their bodies still pressed to each other tightly, and turned him around away from the wall, and lead him in the direction his bed. He hesitantly moved his shaking hands to Kurt's shirt and with trembling fingers reached for buttons. He could feel Kurt smiling against his lips. Blaine broke the kiss and licked his lips. Yes, he tasted the same if not even better than before.

During these torturing months when he thought he would never be able to touch him or speak to him at all, without all those daggers flying in his direction every time when their gazes met. Of course during Christmas they'd become closer again, only thanks to Burt, but the tension between them was still visible. When he told him that he is going to apply to NYADA he wasn't sure what Kurt thought. He looked locked inside himself. Blaine couldn't tell anything, Kurt could completely control his emotions then, what shocked Blaine because he could always read Kurt. And at the wedding... well nothing much had changed really.

Blaine smiled at Kurt, who was looking back at him biting his lip, breathing heavily. They moved slowly and when the back of his knees hit the edge, Blaine practically threw Kurt on the bed. Kurt laughed and the imaginary wall between them fell completely. He climbed onto the bed without hesitancy. He leaned and kissed Kurt hungrily, who slipped his hands under Blaine's shirt moving his long fingers over Blaine's stomach in a way that made every touch, every brush of skin on skin, like a jolt of electricity racing across his nerves.

A low moan escaped from Kurt's mouth and Blaine shivered with pleasure and love, so he squeezed Kurt's arm a little tightly and Kurt hissed and winced slightly. Blaine noticed that and frowned, but didn't pay more attention to that and moved his fingers now travelled across Kurt's bare chest to his stomach and moved his lips over Kurt's jaw to his neck and Kurt wanted this too. Oh God Blaine had no idea how much he wanted to, but...

Blaine ran his lips across Kurt's chest. His skin was so smooth and pale and beautiful and warm and inviting and―

"Blaine?" Kurt breathed out under him.

Blaine hummed to his neck and smiled a little.

"Get off me." pulling him away lightly.

"What?" Blaine stiffened with his lips on Kurt's jaw, his heart missed a jump. He slowly lifted his head up and looked at Kurt.

"Get... please just... let go―" Kurt gasped and pulled Blaine hard away and he fell on his back on the other side of the bed with a low squeak.

"Kurt what... I am sorry!" Blaine didn't know what he was apologizing for, but he surely was too forward towards Kurt. He didn't have a chance to continue because Kurt bolted up and paled even more than he already was. He took several deep breaths and put his own head in his hands.

Blaine noticed he covered the place where he got injured.

"Is your head hurting?" Blaine got frightened. "Doctor should check you when we were in the hos― Kurt!"

"The... New Y― shit!" Kurt covered his mouth with the other hand and ran into the bathroom, Blaine hurried after him, but he slammed the door behind himself.

"Kurt?" Blaine knocked on the door lightly, his eyes wide. "Can I come in?"

Kurt didn't respond. Blaine pressed the door handle slowly to open the door._ Damn_. Stupid locks.

"Kurt please open the door I want to help you!" Kurt was so stubborn. He knocked again now with more urgency.

"I am okay. Just... wait a minute." Kurt said with a choked up voice.

He was on the other side of the door but Blaine could hear how weak his voice is. He leaned into the wall and slid down on the floor next to door. He sank his head into his hands. The door opened after a few minutes.

Blaine stood at the moment, "What happened?" he asked and lead Kurt to the bed slowly.

"I got sick, clearly," Kurt answered with a low voice, shivering here and there, his hair a mess.

"I can see that. But why?"

"You threw me on a bed. I thought it was going to be okay but it wasn't, It happens sometimes when you get hit in the head." Kurt sat on his bed leaned into the pillows.

One sleeve on Kurt's shirt moved up Kurt's arm and Blaine noticed a big bruise over his lower arm. Just now Blaine remember how Kurt hissed when he squeezed his arm, but he was to into make-out to put some significance into it. He really wanted somebody to hit him. Hard. He frightened more when he realized what it meant. But this one was...

"Kurt? Where did you get this?" Kurt looked at him questioningly and Blaine pointed to the bruise with his finger.

"I told you. During dancing at my school. Well I told that to dad but you were there." Kurt said simply shrugging one shoulder and turned his face away from Blaine closing his eyes. All the warmth from Blaine disappeared. He felt cold.

Blaine sat beside him looking down at him. He reached for his arm hesitantly, which stiffened at the touch.

"Please don't lie to me. I am still the same person who is concerned if you are okay. And you are evidently not." Kurt relaxed in his hands after a few seconds.

He pushed a sleeve more up his arm and found a mid-big bruise in the form of_ fingers_. _Fingers!_ If he wasn't frightened before he was definitely scared to death now. What the hell is going on? However, Blaine realized, this meant that he lied. Lied to his dad about his injuries. He travelled his fingers across the bruise gently, he didn't want to cause more pain that he already went through. The ache started raising in his chest.

"Don't tell my dad." Kurt whispered and Blaine looked up at him. Kurt was looking straight at him his eyes wide and rich gray. Kurt knew he knew.

"I'm not going to do that if you don't want me to." Blaine answered weakly, his voice shaking. But this just wasn't acceptable. His Kurt didn't deserve any of this. The pain in his chest became intolerable Blaine almost thought he is going to tear him apart. He felt salty tears falling down his face, through closed eyelids so he shut them more tightly. He had to be strong for Kurt, but how could he. Someone hurt the man he loved with all his heart. A low whimper escaped from him mouth and he shook with suppressed sob.

"Hey, don't cry. I've been crying enough for both of us." Kurt reached his hurt hand and touched Blaine's face to wipe away the tears and Blaine leaned in to his gentle touch. He didn't even notice that he wasn't holding his hand anymore until he opened his eyes.

"But... I... this...is not..." his voice cracked. He gasped and looked through the window. He wasn't able to see him like this. Anger started to form in his hands, he wanted to tear this... this creature who did this to his Kurt apart. _His Kurt?_ He wasn't his. Not yet. But he will be. And nobody would touch him again. Never! Because he would hurt them one thousand times worse and they will be begging him to stop... he silently swore, before realizing that he sounded remotely crazy. But he did mean every fucking word.

"Just don't please. It's...and don't be angry, this is not going to help anything." Blaine looked down at him. Of course this inner turmoil must be shown on his face. His jaw was tightened and his gaze obviously hard. Kurt gave him a sad smile.

Blaine leaned and kiss him on his forehead.

"Okay take your shirt off." Blaine said. "Oh come on Kurt," he said jokingly as an answer to Kurt's horrified look. "I'm just going to check you. I saw you before. All of you I might add. And you need to change anyway, you are not going to sleep in this."

Blaine moved to his dresser and pulled out some pajamas before handing them to Kurt.

"Change only into the pants. Do you need me to help you? Okay I'll wait in the bathroom," he said when Kurt shook his head, and closed the door behind him. He didn't even know who is looking at him from the mirror, but he knew this is definitely not him. He was pale, his eyes red as hell and hair a mess of wild curls. He looked like angora rabbit. He snorted. If the situation wasn't so bad it could be funny.

" 'm tired." Kurt yawned from when he sat on his bed.

"You can go to sleep. It's late. You've been travelling today and you said you didn't sleep." Blaine said. "Okay I checked you. Nothing else hurt or broken, but these bruises look horrible. I'll get something on it. Wait a minute I'll be right back."

"You don't need to" said Kurt weakly.

"I know." Blaine whispered and stood up. "But I want to. You are more important for me that you can imagine. I'll do everything for you. This is really just a bit I can do." with that he left the room.

Kurt almost fell asleep until Blaine came back.

"I found this. I used it when I got hurt in my old school." Blaine said awkwardly.

"Yeah I remember that." Kurt pointed on a salve. "My mom used it on me sometimes when I was younger."

"I brought some bandages so you are not going to dust the salve out." said Blaine with enthusiasm.

"Honestly it's an excellent idea. They are hurting still." Kurt tried to take the salve.

"Uh-uh." Blaine stopped him and pointed on himself.

Kurt sighed and let him. He must admitted it felt really good. Blaine's hands was very careful. He gently rubbed the salve in and bandaged up injured spots on his arm. His eyelids grew heavier and heavier. It was sooo hypnogoogiccc...

"Kurt?" whispered Blaine. He wasn't sure if Kurt was still up.

"Hm..." he wasn't able to tell him more.

"I am done. Do you want me to leave or..."

"No. Stay."

"Can I lay next to you?" asked Blaine never breaking his sight away from Kurt.

Kurt could feel his eyes on him and nodded.

Blaine lied next to him and wrapped his arms around Kurt's waist gently, while Kurt draped himself over Blaine.

" 'm cold. I am always so damn cold. You are so warm." he muttered. Blaine squeezes his eyes tightly and took a deep breath.

"Do I have... we... I – I mean... do we..." started Blaine but stuttered.

"God Blaine. Just say it." Kurt groaned half asleep.

"Do we have any chance to be a couple again?" Blaine blurted out. He didn't want to give his voice a chance to shake. "B - because I really want to. I know I hurt you and I know you are mad at me at least you were. And I know you don't trust me and maybe still hate me," Kurt turned to him and opened one eye, "but I am going to do everything... really, really everything to make it all up to you and make you to trust me again like before."

"You really want me? Some broken..." he waved with bandaged arm, unable to find right words, " whatever I am right now."

"You are everything but broken. Despite what you have been through you are still you. Of course I want you. This doesn't play any role Kurt. I love you," he covered Kurt's hand with his own and squeezed it gently. "Right now I want to find who did this and kill him. By the way are you going to tell me who it was?"

"You don't need to know. What's done is done. It's over." Blaine sighed.

"I hope you punched him back." he said half-jokingly, trying to lighten the situation.

Kurt laughed and waved with his bandaged hand and winked.

"Good._ My Iron man_." Baine tightened his arm around Kurt's waist and kissed his on the top of his head.

"I am everything but this._ Butter man_ fits better."

"No Kurt you are not weak. You are the strongest person I've ever met and I am not kidding. With everything you've been through you are still here. Still alive and still strong. Don't think less about yourself Kurt. Never." Blaine said seriously. "I meant it. You are the most important person in my life and I'll be the happiest person on the world if you'll take me back." Blaine laced their fingers together.

"You hurt me Blaine." Kurt said and turn completely to face Blaine. "And that was not kind of pain I was used to fell. I couldn't crippled it off. I thought I am going to die every second because I couldn't breathe. And now," he took a deep breath, "it's better. I am not mad at you anymore and I forgave you. I can breathe again. And I have to say I still love you with the same intensity I've been hating you for a few past months," he smirked and Blaine , "but... but this doesn't mean I am going to risk that again. I... I really want to but I don't know what to do anymore." Blaine could practically hear the pieces of his heart shattering across the floor.

"Please try it with me again. I swear on everything you want me to, I am never, ever going to hurt you again, because I'll hurt myself too. Do you hear me? Never. That moment was the biggest mistake of my life. I just realized that I am never going to be happy without you in my life. And I am ready to proving it to you every second from now until we both die. I was in pain too Kurt, in that moment you told me to leave and never even try to talk to you again I... I thought I would be sick. And the worst thing was that I realized that all of this was my mistake. That I ruined us and not just me but you too. I ruined the best thing I have in my life I was suffering, but I couldn't even know how much you were and I know you were much worse. I am sorry Kurt. I―"

"Shut it," Kurt cut him off with unreadable expression on his face, but not harshly. "I heard that before." Blaine's heart skipped, Kurt's eyes didn't reflect anything. He is becoming really good at it, Blaine thought and panic was rising inside him, that he doesn't know what Kurt is going to do.

Kurt took a deep breath._ I just hope I am not going to regret it_, he thought anxiously.

"So..." Kurt exhaled,"you said something about proving your love every second from now on, what was two minutes ago." he raised an eyebrow as if challenge Blaine. "So... deal then?"

Blaine knew that smile. This smile belonged to him once. And it is his smile once again..

"You... really?" Blaine whispered in disbelief. He couldn't hear right. He translated it wrong for sure.

They was looking to each other eyes for a moment. Kurt nodded and smiled. Expression in his eyes changed. There was fear, but what was more important there was love too. That was the look he was used to when they were happy and together and in love.

And then it hit him. He beamed and leaned to kiss Kurt sweet but passionately to show him how much he loved him, how much he appreciate this and that he'll never screw his second chance, wrapping him tightly in his arms as to never let go again in the foreseeable future.

"Deal."

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**Woohoo we beat Italy 4:1 in the ice hockey today. LOL **

**Okay here we go. :)) We did it.**

**So guys I really really hope you are not very mad and that you like this chapter.**

**Comments and ideas are welcome, I can use them in later chapters and they made me update faster, so leave some.**

**Love you **

**Patricia xxx**


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